Why would a man, aware of his attraction to other men, choose to marry a woman and live as a heterosexual? We can understand men from the pre-Stonewall generation deciding to live in accordance with mores of an earlier time, though in today's world, where many gay men live openly and honestly, this choice seems needless. But as author David Leddick points out, our understanding is clouded by our perception of gay men as being either in the closet or out of the closet.

"Preconceived notions of why gay men marry must be thrown out the window when you read this book," Leddick reports after having interviewed 40 men ranging in age from 29 to 88. "Each story provides very different and individual insights into why gay men marry and whether they eventually extricate themselves from that arrangement or choose to remain married."

While it is clear that fear, cultural isolation, religion, or family expectations can play a large part in a man's decision to repress his sexuality, many of the men Leddick interviewed express a strong and sincere desire to cultivate and maintain relationships with women--and the reasons underlying their choices are far more heartfelt than society has ever appreciated. Their stories illustrate not only the isolation and deceit of married men who live secret gay lives but also the triumphant stories of gay men who have carved out a completely original life plan. Leddick also makes sure to include the voices of the men's wives, whose attitudes and responses are equally fascinating.

The Secret Lives of Married Men is an invaluable addition to the growing body of literature that explores the vast and varied landscape of today's family.